The natural evolution of our relationships

The natural evolution of our relationships

The natural evolution of our relationships

I remember the time in my relationship when the honeymoon phase was over.

There was a moment of unfulfillment when the excitement of the new started to fade away and I found myself feeling less connected to my partner.

This was part of the natural evolution of our relationship.

Nothing new cannot come to our experience if we don’t first let go of the old.

Not knowing what the future holds can sometimes feel scary. When we are going through a change and don’t know yet what’s there on the other side.

This phase was part of a learning curve for me.

Remembering again how that feeling of connection can only ever come from within us and how we don’t need the other person to change in order for us to find that feeling again.

Remembering how that feeling of connection comes from us being present in the company of the other person — Not the other way around.

Maybe needless to say that going through that phase allowed our connection to deepen and brought even more love into our relationship.

Some relationships never last that long.

When we don’t understand that the other person is not the source of that love and happiness that we want to experience we may want to give up on a relationship.

It simply doesn’t make sense for us to continue together when the love that we were able to experience in the beginning seems to fade.

We are not willing to grow together when we don’t realize this is possible.

We all go through phases when it comes to our relationships.

For some people some of these phases and learning moments may feel easy. We may go through them without even realizing what it is that is happening and then at some point when we look back we’ll see how much we have learnt. How far we have come.

For others these moments may feel painful. Painful when we fear to let go of the old. When we don’t understand what’s happening.

Every relationship looks different. Everyone has their own lessons to learn. Not all the relationships are meant to last and sometimes we find ourselves back home to one another even after long time.

It may all seem so uncertain, yet when we are able to recognize the bigger picture we’ll find ourselves feeling safe.

Safe and loved.

When we remember that everything we go through we may grow through.

And how on the other side there’s only more love and happiness for us to experience.

It takes courage to take that leap of faith.

I thought first I would not write this post. Not yet I thought.

Because I’m self going through a moment of growth.

We are becoming a family of three.

And there’s so much love and excitement present in our relationship because of this new change.

Yet I do recognize how our relationship dynamic is already changing.

I’m growing and becoming a parent. Which is one of the greatest blessings I personally feel like we can experience.

Yet I do recognize how letting go of the old so that the new can be born has felt uncomfortable from time to time.

I thought first that I would write this post when I’m already on the other side. When I can look back in time and understand everything in a deeper level.

Yet I found myself feeling called to put my thoughts and feelings into words.

Because I believe there’s value in recognizing how we all go through these phases of growth. How we all feel uncomfortable from time to time. And how we all go through those moments of not knowing.

The secret is not to never struggle. The secret is understanding how we all do grow and struggle sometimes. And how it doesn’t mean anything about us.

We may experience it. Recognize what we have learnt after going through the experience and recognize the beauty and value of the new that has been born out of that experience.

We can trust that we are taken care of — Loved and carried.

Trust that inner wisdom that guides us in life and tells us what to do. What is the next step for us to take.

And go through those moments of growth and trust that there will be more light and love on the other side.

If you are in the middle of a change you may trust what you feel called to do.

Whether it’s to stay together of continue on your own separate ways. Whether it is to let go or hold on even tighter.

It’s safe to trust.

Trust that if you follow your guidance there will be only more love for you to experience.

The natural evolution of our relationships doesn’t mean that every moment is going to be wonderful.

However it does mean that we have been blessed to grow together with one another.

And how when we go through our experience there will be only more love for us to experience.

No matter of the form it takes.

There will be only more love.

With love,
Heidi

Heidi Paavilainen

Sharing an understanding that allows us to connect more with that deeper part within us, so that we can find our own answers from within, find that greater sense of wellbeing and have relationships that feel good.

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