How to have the life that you love? — By loving what is

The common misunderstanding that is out there is that in order for us to love and enjoy life, our outside circumstances need to to be in good order.

We believe that we need to have that great job, fulfilling relationships and wealth more than what we have among other things, in order to be able to make most of it and enjoy life to the fullest.

But when we think like that we don’t recognize how that’s not really the world we live in. That’s not how we work as human beings.

When we learn to recognize that we are not living in the world of outside circumstances but in the world of our thinking when it comes to fulfillment, we begin to see the fluid nature of our experience. Our desires, wants and needs turn into preferences and we begin to recognize how the contentment we look for comes from somewhere else.

That’s when we begin to see more of the beauty of life and automatically fall more in love with the life that we are already living in.

The world we live in

This is how life used to look like to me and how it looks like for most of us — We believe that our happiness depends on our circumstances.

We believe that in order for us to be happy we need to have whatever we personally place our happiness on. However if we look closely we can see how that’s not how life really works.

We can see people who have terminal illnesses like cancer, who have finally learned to enjoy life. We can see kids in the streets of poor countries who have no idea where their next meal will come from, happier than many of our co-workers in well-paid jobs. We can see people involved in accidents to keep their calm and stay in their wellbeing, only to totally lose their control after the situation is over.

We can see these stories and evidence all around us how people in unfortunate circumstances have found their happiness.

It looks like we are living in the world of our circumstances, but when we begin to see what is more true, we can never go back to that world the same way we used to.

We are living in the world of our thinking.

Living in the world of though

You may have heard that happiness is not a destination, but it’s a way of living.

If we lived in the world of our circumstances, every single person who in a same situation would need to have exactly the same experience of their existence. However we know that’s not true.

We know that people who go to see a movie, every single one of them will have at least a slightly different experience of that movie, even if they are sitting in the same cinema.

This is because we live in the world of our own perception. Our experience is not coming from our outside circumstances, but rather from the way we see our outside circumstances. And that makes all the difference.

When we wake up to see how this is true, we begin to see that our experience is never fixed. It has a more fluid nature. Because of our thinking changes all the time, also our experience changes.

We no longer need to be a victim of our circumstances, but we can begin to see the beauty of the design.

Gift of thought

We are gifted with this gift of thought to experience life. And we can use this gift which ever way we choose to.

We can choose to see the things that we don’t have, the things that we don’t enjoy, or we can choose to see the things that we are blessed with.

The quality of our thinking determines the level of happiness we experience in the moment.

When we choose to pay attention to our negative thinking, we experience this negativity because our thinking and our feelings our directly linked to each other. On the other hand when we pay attention to what we have, to the beauty of life we can feel this, because our thinking in the moment creates our experience.

Living in the world of thought means that we are no longer the victim, nor up against the outside world.

The only thing that we can ever be up against is our own thinking.

Understanding creates opportunity

When we become aware of the world we live in we begin to recognize the opportunity we have to choose.

We begin to see that when we have a numerous amount of thoughts in a day, we can choose the ones pay attention to. We can choose whether or not we want to bring more life to those feelings of gratefulness or dissatisfaction.

To be able to see this automatically gives us more perspective. It allows us to see the world more objectively and find our own happiness in the moment.

When we stop dwelling in our negative and stressful thinking our mind becomes still and we begin to see the world we live in with more clarity. We begin to see that happiness is not dependent on our circumstances — But it is our birthright.

Happiness is something that is already within us. It’s something that we all experience when we are not caught up in our stressful thinking. Understanding this creates an opportunity for us to choose happiness, over our stressful thinking in the moment.

Loving life as it is

The easiest way — and the only way really — for us to have the life of our dreams is to love what is.

Being able to see the world that we really live in allows us to let go of our wants, needs and desires and recognize that they are not the source of our wellbeing.

Because we live in the world of thought and our thinking is always changing, also our experience of life always changes. If we get the things that we place our happiness on we can soon wake up to the reality that we still have our ups and downs. We still experience our moments of joy and sadness.

The nature of our experience is that we will always have our moments of happiness and unhappiness — Regardless of what happens outside of us. Waking up to see how this is true allows us to be more humble in those moments of sadness, and more grateful in the moments of joy.

The more we start to see this, how our experience is always changing the less attached we become when it comes to our negative thinking and the more we begin to find ourselves experiencing the feelings of love and happiness.

The less time we spend worrying about those moments of unhappiness in our lives the more we begin to find ourselves experiencing the natural state of our being — Which is love.

The only thing that can keep us away from our happiness — momentarily — is experiencing a thought in a moment and taking our stressful thinking too seriously. But as soon as we let go of that thought, stop obsessing about it, we slip back into our feelings of contentment and happiness.

And when we do this and come from this place of happiness, not only does it come easier for us to get what we want in life because we no longer are attached to the outcome and therefore can see opportunity more clearly — But also, we cannot help but fall in love with what is.

 

With all my love,
Heidi

 

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